Cohabitation
by liz1967
Summary: What happens when due to a series of unfortunate events, 007 is forced to live with M.
1. Chapter 1

Cohabitation

M unhappily marched down to the quarantine area of the medical department at 8:00 pm as instructed, with Tanner following behind donning a medical mask.

"I ask you Tanner, was that ridiculous mask really necessary?" she snapped

"Just a precaution" he answered in a muffled tone

"It is not an airborne illness you know. But if it were I would have half a mind to rip that bloody thing off your face and breathe on you,"

"You wouldn't," he replied with a horrified expression

"You do realize that this is technically your fault, and I could have you suspended pending further investigation for endangering the life of the head of MI6"

"But Ma'am, all due respect, you know how 007 hates going to medical for a checkup after a mission…"

"I know, but it is procedure, and it is your job to see that he does so that things like this DO NOT happen"

"And again I apologize. If I had only known that..." he started to say before he realized that they had reached their destination

"I believe this is where I leave you" she interrupted as she put her hand on the door "Try not to burn the place down while I am gone" she said with a stern look

"Yes Ma'am" was all he had time to say before she disappeared thru the door that was clearly marked QUARANTINE AREA

M made her way down the hall to the nurse's station and waited rather patiently, considering it was M, while the nurse concluded her phone call.

"Ma'am, right on time. Welcome to your new home for the next two weeks" said the nurse as she rose and came around the desk

"Well, I do not know about two weeks…"

"Follow me please"

M did as she was told and followed the nurse down a narrow corridor to a small changing room.

"I have laid out a gown and a robe for you. You will also find a pair of slippers and a bag of toiletries on the counter. Please put your clothing in the hamper in the corner and be sure to pull the draw string closed." she said in a somewhat clinical tone. "When you have changed please ring the buzzer and wait for me to escort you to your assigned area"

"I still fail to see why I cannot just wear my own things?" grumbled M

"The Doctor wants everything to be as sterile as possible, so unless you would like to have your clothes run thru a sterilizer…"

"That was a rhetorical question my dear" said M sarcastically

"Right then, buzz me when you are ready" replied the nurse as she closed the door behind her

M quickly changed into her gown and robe, put on the slippers, placed her own clothing into the hamper in the corner, rang the buzzer and waited. She could not remember the last time she had been so angry at James.

The nurse eventually returned and escorted M down another long hall to a large observation room with one glass wall and a glass security door. After tapping a few numbers on the key pad the door slid open and the nurse motioned for M to enter.

"How exactly am I to have any privacy with this entire wall being made of glass?" she asked as she glared at the nurse

"There is a curtain separating the two beds and there is a lever on the wall that when pulled down will make the glass cloudy." replied the nurse dryly "There is a call button next to each bed, and …"

"Am I to understand that we will both be sharing the bathroom?"

"Yes Ma'am. Meals will be served at 8:00 am, 1:00 pm and 5:00 pm unless otherwise instructed. You will find a menu on the bed side table" replied the nurse as she closed the door

"Fantastic" muttered M as she wondered over to the bed.

As she sat down a familiar voice spoke to her from behind the curtain surrounding the other bed.

"Just coming for a visit or are you planning on keeping me company during my confinement here at the MI6 Hilton?"

"Oh do shut up 007" snapped M angrily "You know that none of this would have happened if you had just gone to medical for a checkup before turning up with a fever at my flat in the middle of the night to give me a report on the most benign of missions"

"I hardly call it a benign mission…"

"You escorted Maria Ivanov back to London from America for a deposition, I hardly call that dangerous…"

"Apparently it was or I…we would not be here now would we?" he said with a grin as he pulled back the curtain "My how cute you look in that Dior creation, could I interest you in a pillow fight later?"

"Just because you managed to catch a childhood illness, does not give you permission to act like a child" she snapped as she pulled her robe closer around her. "As we will be sharing these quarters for the next few days…"

"Weeks…they told me weeks" he interrupted

"Yes, well we shall see about that, as I was saying, since we will be sharing these quarters for…the foreseeable future, you will conduct yourself in a professional manner. DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?"

"Crystal Ma'am" he replied with a snicker

"What are you laughing at?" she demanded

"I still cannot believe that you have never had the chicken pox" he said shaking his head in disbelief

"Why are you laughing? Neither have you, which is why we are here. Had you gone to medical as you are instructed time and time again…"

"I hate going to medical…"

"I do not care if you don't like it, it is a bloody rule…"

"I prefer to think of it as more of a suggestion," he said with a grin

"Well, thanks to you we have the next few…weeks to discuss what is a rule and what is a suggestion then don't we?" she hissed

"Fabulous, I am stuck in here with the head of the Safety Patrol" mumbled James

"What was that?"

"Nothing Ma'am"

"Good, now that that is settled…"

"Oh by the way, I suggest that you do whatever you intend to do in the next ten minutes" he said with a crooked grin as he looked at the clock above the door

"Oh and why is that?"

"Because it's lights out at 9:00 pm"

"You have got to be kidding" she groaned as she pulled her legs up onto the bed, fluffed the pillows behind her and leaned back against the headboard

"Sorry M, but it is the RULE" he replied with a laugh as he pulled the curtain shut. "And we all know how you feel about rules"

"Oh shut up Bond!"

TO BE CONTINUED...


	2. Chapter 2 chapter 2

M lay curled up in her bed, fuming at the fact that she had absolutely no control over anything including what time the lights went on and off. Thank God her watch happened to have an extraordinarily dim light built into it, not that it was of much use since she had nowhere to go other than perhaps the bathroom. She kept closing her eyes in an attempt to sleep, which in itself was absurd as she had not been able to go to bed before the stroke of midnight since she had taken over MI6. Every time she there was a glimmer of hope that she could achieve sleep, James would start tossing and turning on the other side of the curtain, promptly bringing her back to the state of full consciousness.

"007, if it is not too much to ask, would you please keep still over there!" she said sharply "Some of us are trying to sleep"

"I'M TRYING!" he snapped back as he wiggled around in his bed

"What the hell are you doing anyway?" she asked in an annoyed tone

"If you really must know, I am trying not to scratch" he hissed

"Let me guess, dry skin?" she snickered

James just let out a moan causing M to sit up

"Do you need any help?" she asked in a bit more sympathetic tone

"I'm FINE" he grumbled as he rolled over to face the wall

M did not believe him for a second. James was a master of masking his pain and discomfort, so whatever was going on behind the curtain had to be serious.

She got up and put on her robe and slippers and pulled back the curtain only to find James facing the wall. She quietly walked over to the bed and put her hand on his shoulder, startling him a bit.

"What do you want?" he asked as he pulled the blanket closer around him

"I came to see if I could help, now turn over so I can look at you" she said sternly

James did as he was told, but the light from M's watch was too dim to be able to see much of anything, so M rose and headed toward the bathroom.

"Where are you going? I thought you were going to help me?" said James as he sat up

"I cannot help you if I cannot see you" she snapped as she poked her head into the bathroom and flipped on the light "Now let's see what the problem is" she said turning around

It was all M could do not to laugh when she turned back to face him. When they went to bed a mere two hours ago, James was fine, but now he was covered in tiny red dots. She covered her mouth with her hand to conceal a smile as she quickly diverted her eyes to the floor.

"What? What is it? Why are you laughing?" he asked angrily

"Me? I'm not laughing…wouldn't dream of it" she managed to say with a straight face

James leapt out of bed and rushed into the bathroom to look as himself in the mirror

"MY FACE…what the hell happened to my face" he said as he began to carefully touch the red spots that now adorned his face.

It was not long before he reached down and pulled up his shirt, only to find the same spots on his chest, stomach and lower back. He was about to pull down his trousers when M stopped him.

"Stop right there 007. There is a high probability that if there are spots on the rest of your body, then they could be "there" as well, but I do not need definitive proof" she said as she turned and headed back toward her bed

"But what do I do?" he asked sounding almost panicked

"You have a call button…Call the nurse and ask for some ointment" she said as she climbed back into bed, grinning from ear to ear

"I don't know what you find so funny, you have the same sort of spots on your forehead" he said, pointing at her

M quickly got up and rushed into the bathroom to examine her face. After closing the door and examining the rest of her body, she finally emerged with a rather defeated look on her face.

"Well?" he asked looking at her curiously

"Well what?" she snapped

"Do you have them too?"

"What do you think?" she snapped

"So I guess it will be midnight ointment for two" he quipped as he pressed the call button

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The next morning, M woke and raised her hand to her face, only to hear "Don't scratch" from the other side of the curtain

"How long have you been awake?" she asked as she propped herself up against the headboard

"Long enough to know that you snore" he said with a chuckle

"Ha-ha, very funny." She replied sarcastically "What time is it?"

"Time for breakfast or time to reapply each other's ointment, which ever you prefer" he said as he pulled back the curtain to grin at her

M took a pillow from behind her head and heaved it at him, causing James to burst out laughing

"Now what is so funny?" she demanded as she glared at him

"Oh nothing, other than you are an even worse aim with a pillow than you are with a gun" he replied as he ducked out of the way as a second pillow came sailing thru the air at him.

She was about to let loose with the rant of a lifetime when the door slid open and a clearly unamused nurse appeared with two trays of food.

"What seems to be the problem in here?" she asked in a rather condescending tone as she looked at her two patients

"What makes you think that there is a problem?" snapped M as she glared at James

"You may have the privacy film over the window, but I can still see shadows of things being tossed across the room" she said coolly as she put the trays down "Incidentally, you may want to find another hobby. These quarters are about to become a bit more cramped"

"How do you mean?" asked James as he stood up

"It appears that you two are not the only lucky ones to have contracted this illness" she smirked

"007…who else were you around while you were contagious?" asked M as she stared at him quizzically "Or do I not want to know?"

"I suggest you eat your breakfast so that we may rearrange the room to accommodate two more beds" replied the nurse

"Now wait just a minute. Me, sharing a room with the head of MI6 is one thing…I work directly for her, but you cannot just toss two complete strangers in here…It would be a complete breach of security" James protested as he protectively put his arm around M, much to her annoyance "How exactly am I supposed to protect her in such a small confinement?"

M pulled away and glared at James, as she turned her attention back to the nurse.

"As much as I hate to admit it, 007 is correct. This is completely unacceptable." said M

"I guess you will have to take that up with the Doctor when he comes to check on your progress" replied the nurse, as she turned on her heal and left the room

"This just keeps getting better and better doesn't it?" quipped James in a half-joking, half-serious tone as he took a bite out of a piece of toast that he found on the breakfast tray

"I guess we will have to wait until the other two "victims" arrive and access the situation" replied M as she took a seat at the small table.

"Don't worry M, I will protect you" said James as he smiled and reached over and took her hand

"Let's just hope it does not come to that" she replied as she pinched the bridge of her nose "I am going to have a hard enough time explaining how I ended up in here with you. The last thing I need is to explain yet another mysterious death on MI6 property as a result of your not being able to follow orders"

James just smiled as he continued to eat his breakfast

"I have faith in you M. You always manage to come up with good explanations" he said with a grin

"Yes, well could we at least not need an explanation that defies logic this time?" replied M as she began to eat her breakfast.

TO BE CONTINUED...


	3. Chapter 3 chapter 3

**Sorry this is a shorter chapter, but it was the perfect place to end at the moment LOL**

James and M finished their breakfast in silence, each lost in their own thoughts. James was furious that anyone would even consider dropping two complete strangers in such a confined area with such a high ranking official. "What if she accidentally talks in her sleep?" he thought angrily, or "What if they try to harm her?" What he would not give for a phone right now.

M, on the other hand, was more worried about what people, the PM and Mr. Mallory in particular would think of her current situation. She was fully aware that there had been all sorts of office gossip pertaining to her and Bond. She never took it seriously, the very idea of Bond being attracted to her was absurd, but here she was, alone with him in what could be twisted into a compromising position…"This is all I need!" she thought to herself "Those self-righteous, arrogant prigs at Whitehall are going to have a field day with this!"

After breakfast, the orderlies arrived with two beds and began to rearrange the room. The room itself was large enough to accommodate all four beds, a table and four chairs and a small loveseat. There was a small television located in the corner of the room, however the reception was terrible, and it's only real use was to drown out the constant buzzing of the fluorescent lights.

"So how are we going to handle this?" asked James as he sat beside M on the loveseat

"Handle what?"

"Well, I can't exactly let you stay by yourself with a total stranger"

"You will be no more than ten feet away…fifteen if you use the toilet" she said sounding a bit annoyed.

She realized at once that her answer had come out more sharply than she had intended and reached over and took his hand.

"I'm sorry James, your concern, although well intended is really not necessary. I guess being confined is beginning to get on my nerves" she said apologetically

The fact that she was now using his first name did not go unnoticed as he reached over and put his arm around her and pulled her to him.

"It's alright M. It happens to the best of us." replied James sensing that she was beginning to relax a bit "But may I suggest that for as long as our companions are sharing our accommodations, you sleep on my side of the curtain…just to be safe?"

"Why James…If I did not know better, I would think you are making a pass at me" she said with a mischievous giggle "Which is pointless because I am immune to your charms"

"Oh, I don't know about that" he replied with a grin "I did manage to get my arm around you, and we are technically sharing a bedroom"

"I hardly call being incarcerated in a hospital room the same thing as sharing a bedroom" she said swatting his arm

"It all depends on whose definition we go with" he said as he leaned in in an attempt to kiss her

M placed her hand on his chest to push him back and was about to respond when she looked up and her unusually good nature was suddenly replaced with her more familiar boss mode.

It did not take James long to figure out what had her so perplexed. When he looked over he saw their ever so pleasant nurse escorting their new residents into the room.

"TANNER! EVE! What the hell are you doing here?" she asked sounding both concerned and angry

"Contrary to popular opinion Ma'am, Chicken Pox IS an airborne illness" grumbled Tanner as he stepped into the room with Eve not far behind.

"But how? Neither of you were around 007" replied M suspiciously as she rose and stood before her now spotted office staff

"No Ma'am, but we were around you" said Eve as she came to stand beside Tanner

"Honestly M, How is it that you have two children and yet you do not seem to know the first thing about childhood illnesses?" asked Tanner

"Now Tann….." James started realizing that Tanner had clearly overstepped his bounds with his last comment, but M abruptly cut him off with a response of her own

"Quite simple Mr. Tanner. I had a husband and a nanny. You of all people should know that I did not have the luxury of staying home with my children every time they had the sniffles" snapped M as she glared at him angrily

"Alright children, that is enough" said James as he lightly draped his arm around M's shoulder and guided her back to the loveseat and motioned for her to sit. "Getting angry at each other is not going to help the situation"

"Why James…look at you, being all diplomatic" said Eve sarcastically as she crossed the room and sat beside M "Too bad you don't use that skill on more of your missions, you would save us all a lot of time and money"

"James is right" said M flatly "As difficult as it is, I suggest that we all try to keep our tempers and ego's in check for the duration of this confinement"

"Sorry Ma'am" replied Tanner sheepishly "It's just that…"

"I understand Tanner, believe me I understand" said M as she once again began pinching the bridge of her nose like she always did when she was frustrated with a situation. "Which leads me to my next question…If you are both here then WHO is running the office?"

TO BE CONTINUED...


	4. Chapter 4 Chapter 4

**Sorry this took so long, I got a bit sidetracked last week. :)**

M glared at Tanner while she waited for an answer.

"Well Mr. Tanner...Who exactly did you leave in charge? And what excuse did you give?" hissed M

"Alright everyone...lets calm down," said James as he put his hand on M's shoulder "I am sure that Tanner left the department in capable hands, and I am damn sure that he gave an airtight excuse as to your absence"

M took a deep breath and suddenly found herself rather light headed. James reached out and put his arm around her, guiding her back to the sofa.

"See...getting your knickers in a twist about things you cannot control is not doing you any good so you may as well just relax" he said as he took a seat beside her

"Thank you Doctor Bond, but that still does not answer my question," she snapped as she turned her attention back to Tanner

"Ma'am I...We advised Mr. Mallory of the situation and he will be taking care of the department until we are able to return...," said Tanner quietly as he began to nervously scratch his arm

"So he is aware that we ALL have chicken pox? Oh this is just fantastic..."

"No Ma'am" interrupted Eve "He is only aware that Bill and I have the virus. As far as he is concerned, due to the fact that your office has been contaminated, you have been moved into isolation as a precaution"

"There, you see. He just thinks we are being overly cautious," said James as he began to scratch as well

"007, do stop scratching before I cover our hands with socks and secure them in place with duct tape," replied M as she leaned back against the sofa and closed her eyes

"M...are you feeling alright? You look a bit pale" asked Eve as she knelt beside M

"I'm fine," she said sharply

"I don't think so," said James as he felt her forehead "You appear to have a fever and your spots look different from ours. Ours seem to be all over, but yours are more clumped together..."

"Will you stop hovering over me as though I am a child" she groaned as she pulled away from him "I am going to lie down for a while," she said rising from the sofa "So if you three can possibly manage it, would you try to keep it down"

"Yes Ma'am" replied Eve as she watched M disappear behind the curtain.

Making sure M was settled; Eve gently grabbed James and Tanner and pulled them to the furthest corner of the room.

"James. This arrangement is simply not going to work. There is no way we can all "live" together in this fish bowl for the next few days..."

"Weeks...They told me weeks..." interrupted James

"I don't care if it is hours, the fact remains that we CANNOT stay here, so you have a new mission," whispered Eve

"Really? Sounds intriguing, what is it...?" asked James with a curious grin

"Stop being such a smart ass, wipe that ridiculous grin off your face and "Use" that famous charm to get us moved to a more suitable location before we kill each other!" she hissed as she glared at him with a rather impressive imitation of M causing James to giggle

"And, what would be your ideal location? Buckingham Palace...I here they have a few spare rooms..." he snickered

"James..." she murmured in a low angry tone

"Alright, I will see what I can do," he said glancing at the closed curtain separating M from the rest of them "For her"

The nurse about an hour later came in to take all of their vitals and evaluate their progress. James managed to pull her aside before she crossed the threshold of the "forbidden zone" to check on M and whispered into her hear.

"You do realize that what you are asking is rather unusual" replied the nurse as she pulled back and stared at James

"Well, you have to admit, THIS is a rather unusual situation" he replied in a serious tone.

"I will have to go and check with the Doctor and Mr. Mallory of course," she said with a hint of a smile as she disappeared out the door

Eve and Tanner sat at the table and watched in amazement as James crossed the room and sat down.

"What exactly did you say to her?" asked Tanner

"I simply explained the situation and offered an alternative to our current living conditions" he replied with a grin

"Which is?" asked Eve anxiously

"The way I see it we have two options" he said leaning in close so as not to disturb M "We could either all move to M's flat which has more than enough room..."

"I don't see that happening" interrupted Tanner

"Or, we could all move to the flat that MI6 keeps for visiting dignitaries. That particular flat only has two bedrooms where M's flat has four"

"And you know this how?" asked Tanner suspiciously

"Doesn't matter," replied James "All we have to do is get the powers that be to agree to one of the options and our lives in the fishbowl come to an end"

"Do you really think it will work?" asked Eve

"Does really think WHAT will work?" asked M, who was obviously awake

"M, how long have you been standing there?" asked Tanner

"Long enough to know that you three are up to something" she said dryly "And whatever it is the answer is NO!"

"Now M, we are only trying to find a way for us to be relocated to a more suitable location," said James with a smile as he got up and guided her to the table

"Oh, and just what did you have in mind?" she asked, eying the three of them carefully

"Well there is the flat we keep for visiting dignitaries..."

"Go on" replied M

"Or there is your flat"

"Umm, NO" she said in a rather end of conversation tone

"Now M, Do not be so quick to judge, you have not heard our reasoning yet..."

"007, this "plan" as you call it has you written all over it. If you think for one minute I would willingly let you come and STAY at my flat..."

"Aww M, you know it has always been my dream to wake up in your flat, but that option was purely for your benefit" said James sincerely "I thought it would be easier on you if you were in your own flat, in your own bed...by yourself"

"Thank you James." she said quietly as she reached over and patted his hand "I am touched that for once you were actually thinking of my wellbeing, however, Mr. Mallory will never consent to the three of you staying with me" she said sounding almost disappointed "It would be a severe breach of protocol, and I do believe that you have all managed to overlook the fact that if we all move to my flat, then Mr. Mallory will be able to surmise that I also have the virus thus exposing your story of just keeping me isolated as a precaution as a lie"

"Mr. Mallory is fairly observant, he will most likely have already tumbled to the conclusion that you have been infected as well," said Eve "And we are already going to have to be together for the duration, what difference does it make WHERE we are"

"The private residence of the head of MI6 is "supposed" to be a secret, a fact that at least one of you keeps forgetting" replied M sarcastically as she glanced at James

"Yes, but it really is the best option." interjected Tanner" It has the security you need, and you certainly have more than enough room"

"Well..." replied M, appearing to warm to the idea

"There is no harm in asking," said James as he put his arm around her

"I suppose not, just do not go pinning your hopes on this" she replied in a doubtful tone.

TO BE CONTINUED...


	5. Chapter 5 Chapter 5

**Sorry this had taken so long, but I got a bit side tracked with life :) Enjoy**

Garreth Mallory stood in the hall desperately attempting to conceal a giggle, as he stared at the diminutive and rather speckled head of MI6 while James, Eve and Tanner attempted to "look" busy while eavesdropping on the conversation. He was thankful that a wall of triple pane glass separated the two because he was almost certain that if she had the opportunity; M would have reached out and slapped him senseless.

"You do realize that this is against every protocol in the book," he said in between giggles

"Garreth, I would not be asking if it were not necessary" she replied, clearly not as amused with the topic as he

"And how long do you think this "arrangement" will be necessary?" he asked with a smirk

"According to the Doctors, once the sores have scabbed over, we will no longer be contagious..."

"I seem to recall that being the case when my children suffered from this affliction" he said with a smile "I suppose there is no point in telling you no"

"Not really. This is more or less just a courtesy conversation." she said dryly "As I said earlier, moving to my flat will allow me to oversee my agents who are currently on missions while you continue to run the day to day operations in my absence. I most certainly have all of the security I could possible need, and I will have Mr. Tanner there to assist, and ..."

"Alright M. You have made your point. I will make the necessary arrangements, and have you and your team moved as soon as possible," he said

"Thank you. I will also need a few things sent over from Q branch so that I may..."

"M" he interrupted in a sincere tone "Please do not take this the wrong way, but you need to spend your time resting, not orchestrating delicate tactical maneuvers halfway around the world..."

"That is my job. Terrorists wait for no one..."

"How about this, I will allow you to observe, and possibly offer suggestions, but I will be the point of contact for our agents until you are able to resume your duties"

M took a step forward and glared at him

"Oh this can't be good" whispered Eve as she watched M go toe to toe with her boss

"Shhh" hissed Tanner

"What? You think she doesn't know we are listening" snickered James as he glanced at Tanner "It's a good thing the glass is separating them or M would have his guts for garters right about now" he whispered

"Fine!" she grumbled "But I insist on being kept abreast of any developments and, you are NOT to make any decisions without first contacting me" she added

"Alright M, I promise, no final decisions without your approval" replied Mallory, a bit unhappy with the outcome of their discussion

"Good. Now that this is settled, we will be waiting for your transfer to my flat," she said as she turned and walked away, effectively ending the conversation

"So how did it go?" asked Tanner innocently

"You bloody well know HOW it went as you were sitting no more than ten feet away" she snapped "That man will use any excuse he can to attempt to take over MY department"

"Now M" said James in a calm tone "You and I both know this not the case. You are physically unable to be in your office at the moment, and SOMEONE has to be in charge. I should think you would rather have Mallory rather than some imbecile from Whitehall stepping in and making a complete mess"

"I suppose you are right," she said letting out a long sigh "But that does not mean I have to like it"

"Now then" chimed Eve "Sleeping arrangements at M's flat"

"What about them?" asked M, in a rather curious tone

"Where would you prefer us?" she asked

"I would prefer you all to be in your own flats, but as this is not the case, I have 3 spare rooms. Feel free to choose whichever room will suit you best...and 007, MY room is not an option" she replied sternly

"Now M, how am I to protect you If..."

"I can assure you that I will be perfectly safe in my own bed," she said coolly

"But..."he started

"007. How long do you intend to circle this particular drain? My word is final in this subject!"

"Ok, if you insist" he replied with a wink

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M and her three temporary flat mates were released from isolation a few hours later and driven to her flat in an ambulance, much to her annoyance.

"So much for being inconspicuous" she grumbled "I fail to see why the ambulance was necessary!" she said as she hopped out of the back and began to make her way up the steps "It is not as if any of us are unable to get in and out of a normal car without assistance"

"They are just being cautious, and they do not want anyone else coming into contact with us at the moment as we MAY still be contagious" replied Tanner in an attempt to calm his already annoyed boss

"May is the operative word here Mr. Tanner," snapped M as she opened the door and ushered her guests inside. "It is only Chicken Pox for Christ's sake, not the plague"

Once they were all inside and the ambulance had disappeared around the corner, M closed the door and turned to face her staff.

"I have a few ground rules before you all get settled" she said in her familiar boss tone "First, there is to be absolutely NO snooping in any drawer, cupboard, wardrobe or file cabinet do I make myself clear?"

"Yes Ma'am" they replied in unison

"My bedroom is strictly off limits unless it is a dire case of emergency..."

"Define DIRE" replied James with a grin

"Dire, 007 means that your arse had better be on fire or the world had better be about to end abruptly" she snapped

"Duly noted," he replied with a snicker

"There are fresh towels in the linen closet next to the guest bath upstairs. Eve, if you would prefer, you and ONLY you may use my private bathroom"

"Well that is hardly fair," replied James with a mock hurt expression

"Keep it up James and I will confine you to your room for the duration of our internment together," warned M with a glare

"Right" he replied with a small Salute causing M to roll her eyes

"You may eat whatever you can find in the kitchen, however, I expect you to clean up after yourselves. Contrary to popular belief, this is not a bed and breakfast and I do not have an army of maids in the ready waiting to clean up after you"

"M" said Eve quietly "We are not children..."

"Given your combined track records, that remains to be seen"

"Anything else Boss?" asked Tanner in an attempt to diffuse the situation before it escalated any further

"No, I think that about covers it"

"Right then" said James in a cheery tone "Who would like a drink?"

"007, although I am no medical expert, I believe that we are meant to take our medication with water, NOT alcohol," said Tanner

"Tanner!" replied James with a laugh "I never took you for a teetotaler"

"I'm not!" snapped Tanner "I am just stating a fact"

"It has been my experience that alcohol enhances the effectiveness of the medication," said James

"Says the man who never once follows directions, even the ones on pill bottles" snickered Eve

"Alright you three. We've been here a total of ten minutes and you are already beginning to try my patience," said M as she headed toward the stairs "I am going up to get some rest. Please try to be quiet and above all please try to get along. We have at least five more days of being together in my flat"

"Want me to come tuck you in?" asked James with a wink

"007, touch that door knob and you will pull back a bloody stump!" she said with an icy glare as she turned and ascended the steps

"Guess she told you" said Eve as she flopped down on the sofa with a wide grin

"Just give me some time," replied James with a mischievous smile "I know just how to melt that icy exterior of hers"

007, are you sure it is wise to toy with her when she is ill?" asked Tanner "I mean have you never heard the expression don't poke the sleeping bear?"

"She just needs to loosen up and let us take care of her" replied James in a serious tone "And that is what I intend to do...take care of her, whether she likes it or not!"


	6. Chapter 6 Chapter 6

**Sorry this took so long. Hope you enjoy.**

It had been 2 hours since M had retreated to the privacy of her bedroom leaving James, Eve and Tanner to fend for themselves. In that two hours there had been no less than five arguments about what to eat, who was responsible for the cleanup and the choice of entertainment, which was rather limited given that M basically used her flat as an enormous storage space for her personal belongings.

"You would think that she would at least have a nice selection of DVD's or CD's" mumbled Tanner as he began perusing the book shelf for anything remotely interesting to read. "So far all I have been able to find is a vast collection of poetry, the complete works of one William Shakespeare and the Oxford English dictionary"

"Well, what did you expect? The woman is hardly home for more than four hours at a time" said Eve as she leafed thru a months old magazine on the coffee table

"Yes, but she has children and grandchildren…you would think she would have something here to entertain them" he snapped back

"Tanner!" replied James in an annoyed tone "How long have you been her assistant? When is the last time you can recall M mentioning a visit from her children or grandchildren?"

"Point taken, but she does not necessarily tell me everything" Tanner said defensively

"You, of all people should know better! Not a very good assistant are you," teased James

"Alright you two…that's enough. We all need to try to get along so Tanner, keep looking for something to occupy yourself since work does not seem to be on your radar at the moment, and James stop needling him and go work on your "Staying out of trouble" skills. I have it on good authority that you definitely could use some work in that area" snapped Eve

"Yes m'lady…anything else?" replied James

"Or you could go out and do up the dishes" she suggested as she turned her attention back to her magazine.

James turned abruptly and headed toward the kitchen with a scowl on his face. It did not go unnoticed that neither of them mentioned going up to check on M. It had been awfully quiet upstairs and he was beginning to become a bit concerned.

It was not a big surprise that M had decided to distance herself from them as she was an extremely private person, but at the very least she should be hungry by now so he decided to pop up the back stairs and check on her.

As he reached the top of the stairs he stopped and listened for any sign that she was awake. Noting the absence of sound, he quietly crept the last few feet and put his ear to her door. Still no sound from her room so he put his hand on the knob and was about to open the door when he heard "THE WORLD HAD BETTER BE ABOUT TO END BOND!"

A smile crept across his face as he opened the door and stepped in to find M laying on her side with her back toward the door.

"No, not yet but I thought it best to keep you informed" he said with a laugh "Actually I just came up to see if you were hungry?"

"Nice try" she replied as she turned over so that she was facing him "So what is on your mind?" she asked

"You never miss a thing do you?" he said as he took a few steps forward "How did you know it was me?"

"That's far enough" she said sharply "And as for your question…Who else would dare to disturb me in my bedroom after I left what I considered to be very explicit instructions to the contrary?"

"Ahh you know me too well" he quipped

"Let's just say that I am well acquainted with your inability to follow instructions" she replied "And you still have not answered my question…What do you want…really?"

"I really was just checking to see that you are alright. It was awfully quiet up here and I was beginning to get worried. You didn't look so good when you came up" he said sincerely

"I'm fine, but thank you for checking…anything else?"

"Well, not to be indelicate, but I was wondering if I could take a look at your bumps" he said sheepishly

"MY WHAT? Most certainly NOT!" she snapped, almost horrified at the suggestion

"Relax" he said with a laugh "What I meant was your pox marks on your back. Yours appeared to be different than ours"

"That is because they are" she said quietly "Mine are not chicken pox, mine are shingles…the adult version of chicken pox. Much more painful…"

"All the more reason to let me check on them" he interrupted

"Since when have you become a medical expert?" she asked curiously "You wouldn't even know what you are looking at"

"Maybe not, but I have the advantage of being able to see where you cannot and I can tell if they look bad and require more professional attention" he said defensively "And it is time for your medication and ointment and incase it has escaped your notice, you are going to have a rather difficult time getting your ointment on some of those spots"

M, realizing that he did have a valid point, finally nodded in agreement, sat up and began unbuttoning her blouse.

"If you tell anyone and I mean anyone what you are about to see, I will have you shot or better yet I will shoot you myself…at close range so I am not likely to miss got it?"

"Loud and clear Ma'am, all in the interest of National Security…" he replied with a grin as he moved closer to the bed and began to inspect her back "Oh they don't look so bad, all things considered" he said as he lightly touched one of the spots, causing her to wince in pain

"Yes…well stop that would you it hurts" she said as she carefully pulled her blouse back on

"Before you do up your buttons, let me get your ointment" he said as he rose and headed toward her bathroom

"You are awfully comfortable strutting around my bedroom…you would almost think that you have been here before" she said suspiciously

James returned with the ointment and a grin on his face

"Well, maybe once or twice" he said as he sat beside her, pulled her blouse away from her skin and began dabbing the ointment on the offending spots

"Oh do tell on what occasion or rather occasions did you find it necessary to invade my bedroom?" she asked as she glared at him slightly

"Oh just about every time you were about to return after a long business trip. I thought it would be a good idea for you NOT to have any unexpected visitors waiting for you" he replied with an innocent look

M just rolled her eyes in annoyance

"And just how long has this been going on?" she asked in a more demanding tone "Did you do this while my husband was alive?"

"Of course not. He usually stayed home so there was no need," said James as he finished applying the ointment "It was only after he has passed that I thought…"

"You do know that I have an entire security detail assigned to me?"

"Yes, and don't think that they did not pose a bit of a challenge" he said rather nonchalantly

"Well that is what they are paid to do…make it a challenge for unwanted people to get to me" she pointed out

"And my job is to get into places I am not supposed to be, so I guess we should all get high marks for being VERY good at what we do" he replied with a wink

"What am I going to do with you" she said shaking her head and rolling her eyes

"You are going to sit back, relax and let me take care of you" he replied as he put his arm around her and leaned them carefully back against the pillows

"Do I have any other options?" she asked as she tilted her head up to look at him

"No, not really, I just thought it would be nice to give you the allusion that you do…sort of like you do with me when you are prattling on in my ear when I am on a mission"

"You really are a smart ass aren't you" she said as she rested her head against his shoulder

"Yes, but truth be told you wouldn't have it any other way" he replied with a grin as he leaned down and placed a kiss to the top of her head.

to be continued...


	7. Chapter 7 Chapter 7

So sorry this took so long, but I finally finished this chapter. Thank you for being so patient:)

M woke about an hour later to the sound of rather loud, rhythmic snoring in her ear. For a brief moment she thought it was he husband David, but then she remembered that he had been dead for nearly two years and then it dawned on her that David never snored. That is when it all came back to her. James gently pulling her back against the pillows, rubbing soothing circles on her upper arm, kissing the top of her head and telling her to relax and close her eyes.

"That cheeky little bugger!" she thought to herself "How in the hell am I going to explain THIS! He is not even supposed to be in my home, let alone in my bed!"

After a few moments of trying to gracefully extricate herself from his grip, which only made him hold on tighter, M finally decided that force was her only option so she elbowed James sharply in the stomach causing him to yelp in pain.

"What the hell was that for?" he grumbled, still half asleep

"That was for inviting yourself into my bed without my permission" she snapped as she wiggled out of his grasp "You have about five seconds to get off of this bed and out of this room!"

"Hey, I didn't hear you complaining when you snuggled up against me and fell asleep" he said with a sly grin as he sat up and dangled his feet off the side of the bed

"For your information, I was under the influence of strong medication at the time," she snapped "What did you think you were doing? Were you not listening when the Doctor specifically told us that there was to be no physical contact between any of us until our sores had scabbed over in order to keep this from getting any worse?" replied M as she shoved him off the bed

"I THOUGHT I was taking care of you, comforting you in your time of need…" he said as he reached one arm over his head the other arm around his back in an attempt to reach an unreachable point somewhere in the middle of his back, doing a slightly amusing little dance in the process

"What ARE you doing?" she asked attempting to conceal a giggle

"I have the proverbial itch that needs scratching" he hissed as he continued on with his contortions

"Sounds like a personal problem to me" she snickered as she got out of bed

"What are you doing?" he asked as she came toward him

"Well I was going to open the door and have Tanner alert the media, but then that would lead to a multitude of questions that I am neither willing or able to answer at this particular time, so IF you would just stand still, I will help you scratch your itch" she said with a grin

"Really? You would do that for me?" he asked sounding a bit surprised

"It's the least I could do since you were kind enough to apply my ointment for me" she said as she began scratching midway up his back "There is that better?" she asked

"A little more to the left…down…left…left…"

M soon discovered that he was directing her toward his front and stopped abruptly.

"There. I think you can manage by yourself from there"

"Oh, just when I was beginning to really enjoy myself" he said in a slightly disappointed tone as he reached out and put his arm around her, pulling her into a gentle embrace.

Just as M was about to respond with a rather snide retort, they heard a knock at the door and all of the color seemed to drain from her face. For the first time, James actually saw his usually tough as nails boss in total panic mode and truthfully it was rather amusing.

"Who is it?" she asked in an unusually fake, cheerful tone as she pulled away from him and began to pace nervously around her room.

James just looked at her as if she had suddenly grown a second head. Never in his life had he ever seen her panic.

"It's me M, Tanner…I was just checking to see if you are alright?" said Tanner suspiciously

"Fine…I'm fine" she replied as she motioned for James to go hide in the bathroom

"You've got to be…" started James in his normal tone before M cut him off abruptly with a sharp shush and one of her famous death glares

"You have got to be kidding" he whispered as he slowly moved toward the door

"Just do it and be quick about it!" she snapped "I cannot have him find you in here!"

"M…who are you talking to?" asked Tanner suspiciously

"Me? I'm not talking…it must be the television…"

"M, you do not have a television in your bedroom" replied Tanner "Who is in there? Is that 007?"

"What? Why would you say that?" she replied nervously as she glanced at James

"M, I'm coming in" said Tanner as he put his hand on the door knob

"Oh for Christ's sake" grumbled James as he stepped out of the bathroom and crossed the room and opened the door "Hello Tanner, something we can do for you?" he asked

"007, what the hell are you doing up here? Better yet, how did you get up here? I was sitting on the sofa with a clear view of the stairs just so something like this would not happen!" snapped Tanner as he glared at James

"Sorry Alfred old chap, I forgot to tell you that there is a secret entrance to the Bat Cave"

"I beg your pardon" said M with a less than amused tone

"Sorry M. I was not implying that you are a Bat"

"Keep it up 007" she hissed "And Tanner, just what did you mean when you said "so something like this would not happen" she demanded as she glared at Tanner

"Yes Tanner…Just what did you mean?" repeated James with a mischievous grin as he stared at Tanner, just waiting to see how M's brilliant Chief of Staff would get out of this gracefully.

Tanner was fully aware that James had more than the typical schoolboy crush on their boss, and he was also aware that M had a definite soft spot for her wayward agent. That being said, he also knew his boss well enough to know that even IF she did share similar feelings for her agent as he for her, she would consider such a relationship completely unethical, and unprofessional not to mention completely absurd.

"What I meant to say was that…"

"Yes" replied M with her arms folded across her chest

"You were meant to be resting, not having 007 up here pestering you" said Tanner as tiny beads of perspiration began to form across his forehead

"Hey, what is going on up here?" asked Eve as she suddenly appeared from behind Tanner "James…what are you doing up here?" she asked curiously "Just because we are not in the office does not mean that you can go waltzing into M's bedroom without and invitation or an appointment!" she snapped as she glared at him "And Tanner, what excuse to you have for entering the forbidden zone?"

"That will be enough Eve" said M calmly as she glanced back and forth between her Chief of Staff and her favorite agent

"Might I suggest that we continue this amusing, albeit awkward, conversation in what we have come to know as the neutral zone?" quipped James with a crooked grin

"Excellent Idea 007" replied Tanner as he turned quickly, nearly toppling Eve as he headed out the door

"Right then" said Eve with a befuddled look on her face as she turned and followed him out the door.

"After you" said James motioning to the door

M slowly walked across the room with a silly grin on her face

"If I may ask, What is do you find so amusing?" asked James curiously

"I was just thinking...If this is the bat cave, then I am Batman, and that must make you Robin" she replied with a giggle

"Just what makes you think you are Batman?"

"My Cave, My rules boy wonder" she replied swatting him on the arm as she strolled out the door with a grin

TO BE CONTINUED...


	8. Chapter 8 Chapter 8

M descended the staircase, rounded the corner and stood in the doorway of her sitting room to see her Chief of staff staring curiously at his shoes as though the laces had magically come to life, her Secretary consciously avoiding her gaze choosing to look anywhere but in her direction and her favorite agent leaning against the wall with a silly grin spread across his face.

"Everyone on the sofa! And wipe that silly grin off of your face" she said sharply

Eve, Tanner and James did as they were told and sat at attention on the sofa as if they had been called to the headmaster's office.

"Now then. Before you ask, let me say that NOTHING inappropriate happened upstairs..."

"The thought never entered my mind," interrupted Tanner

"Of course it did," snapped M "Do you think I was born yesterday? I know how it must have looked and had I walked in on a similar situation I may have made the same assumption. We are all human Mr. Tanner"

"Ma'am" interrupted Eve "If I may be so bold, If nothing happened, then why the need for an explanation?"

James and Tanner both turned to look at Eve, who was seated between them, as though she had suddenly grown a second head. "How could ANYONE be so stupid as to question their boss, especially when their boss happens to be M?" James thought to himself

M began to blush slightly before becoming completely serious again.

"Because I do not want there to be any misunderstandings. That being said I feel the need to clarify a few simple rules since clearly I was not specific enough earlier. ALL drawers, closets, cupboards with the exception of the ones in the kitchen and above all MY bedroom are off limits do I make myself clear? If you, even for a nanosecond, have to ask yourself "Should I be opening this whatever..." then the answer is NO! IF you cannot abide by these simple rules then please remain in your assigned bedrooms for the duration of your stay. DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?"

"Crystal Ma'am" replied Tanner quietly

"Right then. I am going back upstairs. I will be down shortly and we will discuss our meal options. In the mean time I believe that Mr. Mallory sent over the laptops I requested Tanner, why don't you and Eve make yourselves useful by doing some actual work, and 007 you can work on staying out of trouble" she snapped as she turned and marched back upstairs

A collective sigh could be heard as she left the room.

"That went well," quipped James

"Thank you ever so much for that 007!" hissed Tanner as he rose from his seat and started toward the laptop on the desk

"What did I do?" replied James quizzically

"Don't play stupid James, it does not suit you" snapped Eve "I guess we know why her children do not visit often...zero tolerance for stepping out of line"

"That is not a fair assumption!" snapped James defensively "I happen to know for a fact that M is far more caring than either of you will ever know. Did either of you know that when her daughter was hospitalized for pneumonia M, who was overseeing a mission in France at the time, flew home every night to check on her? Or did you know that when 004 was killed in action in Afghanistan, M personally flew there just so she could accompany the body home? Do either of you know how many times I have woke in a hospital to have M sitting beside me, holding my hand or sleeping in the chair next to my bed?"

As M stood at the top of the stairs listening to the litany of examples of her kindness and compassion James was spouting, her eyes began to sting with the tears that were beginning to form in her eyes.

"And you Tanner...How many nights have you sat at Eve's desk and watched M make endless personal calls of condolence to the families of fallen agents, some of who were not even her agents?" demanded James "To even assume for an instant that she is uncaring or cold is inconceivable. Where her family is concerned, she did what she had to do...it was her job" he concluded storming out of the room

"I didn't mean to imply that..." started Eve

"Let it go Eve. He will calm down eventually." said Tanner "James and M have a rather long and slightly unorthodox history. She recruited him when he was very young. His parents had been killed and he was alone and she for lack of a better work saved him in fact she continually saves him. It is only natural that he would jump to her defense. The long and the short of it is that he loves her," replied Tanner quietly

"We ALL love her Bill," said Eve

"Yes but not like he does."

Eve cast Tanner a quizzical glance but decided against pressing the matter further.

M turned and went to her room, closing the door behind her, tears slipping down her cheeks. She always knew that James cared about her, but she never realized how deep his feelings were until now.

James went to the kitchen and began opening then slamming cupboard doors, searching for something to make for dinner. Finding nothing appealing he just stood at the sink, hands gripping the counter with his eyes closed and his head down. He was so deep in thought and anger that he did not hear the creak from the back staircase.

M had used the back staircase to come down to the kitchen; she stood silently and watched James for a few moments before she crossed the room to stand behind him. Reaching out she slipped her arms around his waist, giving him a gentle squeeze as she rested her head against his back.

Startled by her sudden show of affection, James turned in her arms and wrapped his arms around her pulling her close, gently pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

"I take it you were listening?"

She nodded as she rested her head against his chest.

"Thank you" she said quietly "But you did not have to say all of those things"

"No need to thank me" he whispered "They just needed to be reminded that you are a mortal just like the rest of us"

M began to giggle as she snuggled into his embrace. "Fantastic. I guess my secret is out now,"

"I guess so," he said resting his chin comfortably on her head "So what would you like for dinner?" he asked changing the subject

"Why don't we order out? Reynolds can go pick it up, my treat...as a sort of peace offering," she suggested

"Why should you be the one to offer a peace offering? They were the ones who..."

"Because, perhaps I overreacted a bit," she said cutting him off mid sentence

"But..."

"We are all under a lot of stress and I could have handled the situation a little better," she said softly

James pulled back and put his hand on her forehead

"What the hell are you doing?" she asked swatting his hand away

"Just checking to see if you are running a fever," he said with a rather comical look on his face "I could have sworn that you just freely admitted that you were wrong,"

"I admitted to no such thing" she retorted, "I simply stated that perhaps there may have been a better way to handle the situation"

"In plain English, you admitted that you were wrong," he teased

"What is going on in here?" asked Eve as she stood in the doorway, staring at James with his arms around M "Or shouldn't I ask?"

"M just admitted that she was wrong," replied James with a hint of amazement in his voice

"I did not," said M as she attempted to wiggle out of his grasp

"What didn't she do?" asked Tanner as he came to stand beside Eve, "Oh bloody hell, not again" he said in an exasperated tone as he noticed James with his arms around their boss. "007, would it be at all possible for us to make it through at least one two hours without you accosting M"

"Relax Mr. Tanner, this time I accosted him," replied M with a grin

"I beg your pardon?"

"This may come as a shock to you Mr. Tanner, but I have feelings for James, I just did not realize how strong those feelings were until the last few days" said M as she motioned for them all to move back to the sitting room

"I have feelings for all of you," she said as she sat on the sofa next to James, purposely putting his arm around her "My children do not visit because they have no idea what I actually do and for their safety, I need to keep it that way. My husband tried his best, but even he did not completely understand. You three are the closest thing I have ever had to a "real" family, so if I am hard on you or you think I am being completely unreasonable it is because I love you all, I am just not very good at expressing that because life is fragile and in this business life can change in an instant" she said with a look of great sadness in her eyes

"We love you too M," replied Tanner as he reached over and tentatively patted her hand

"And if you repeat any of what I just said I will deny it all and blame it on the pain medication" she said with a mischievous and yet slightly serious grin

"Understood" said Eve as she rose from her chair

"Where are you off to?" asked Tanner

"I thought I would make us some dinner...care to join me?" she asked

Tanner began to blush slightly as he rose from the sofa "Gee I thought you would never ask"

"Mr. Tanner, I have been meaning to ask you...when were you planning on informing me of your current dating status?" asked M

"What do you mean?"

"I do believe that when one dates a coworker, one is required to inform their immediate supervisor," she said in her usual no nonsense boss tone

"Well...I...We..." he began to stammer

"It's alright Tanner. Given our current situation, consider me informed, and by the way I have no problem with your relationship with Eve as long as it does not interfere with you work duties" replied M

"Thank you M, but how did you know?" he asked curiously "We have been so careful..."

"I am a spy Mr. Tanner...it is my job to know what goes on above and below the radar" she said with a smile

James tried to conceal a giggle as Tanner nearly tripped over his own two feet getting out of the room.

"Just what are you giggling at?" she asked as she turned to face James

"What? It was funny...did you see the look on his face?...priceless" exclaimed James

"Not nearly as priceless as the one on Mr. Mallory's face when I told him how I felt about you" she retorted

"You did what?"

"Mallory asked me point blank if it was going to be a problem having you stay at my flat given that it apparently is no secret how you feel about me," she said with a sly smile

"What did you tell him?" asked James curiously

"I told him that we are both very professional and we do not let our feelings get in the way of our job" she said as she reached up and ran her finger over one of the spots on his face "Looks like your spots are beginning to scab over"

"You are changing the subject," he said as he reached up and took her hand "What did you really tell him?"

"Nothing that was it" she said attempting to wrestle her hand from his grasp

"You are lying," he said as he narrowed his eyes

"Really?"

"You have a tell" he said with a grin "Whenever you are not exactly telling the entire truth, you bite the inside of your lower lip"

"I do not!"

"Yes you do and it is adorable, Now what did you really tell him?"

"I told him that I was aware of the office gossip and should you choose to move our relationship forward I had no objections" she replied softly as she gazed up at him

"You said that?" he said in a stunned tone

"Unless that is not what you want" she replied cautiously

"Not what I want? Of course, it is what I want; I just did not think it was what you wanted. I thought you would reject the idea"

"Things change James. It is only when we almost lose everything that we realize what is most important in our lives." she said as she winced a little while settling back against him

"How very philosophical of you" he said as he eyed her curiously "I think we should get you back upstairs to rest" he concluded in a concerned tone as he rose and scooped her into his arms "And before you change your mind"

"Be careful James...I could get very accustomed to this sort of treatment," she said as she wrapped her arms around his neck

"I am counting on that" he replied giving her a quick kiss

TO BE CONTINUED...


	9. Chapter 9 chapter 9

Thank you for all of the reviews, and Thank you to BJames for giving me a fantastic idea. Hope this meets with your approval :)

M rested her head against his shoulder, a little apprehensive of what could happen next as James carried her up the stairs, down the hall

"What?...That's it?" she asked as he gently deposited her on her bed, kissed her forehead and turned to leave

"Well what were you expecting? For me to jump you the first chance I get?" he replied with a quizzical expression "These things take time and patience...a lot of patience," he explained

"Bond at my age...time is not on my side," she said reaching for his hand

"But...you are not well. I want you in tip top condition,"

"Well then I am afraid that you will have an awfully long wait," she said as she pulled her hand back "But perhaps you are right. There are still a few details that need to be sorted out before we can begin whatever this is anyway"

"What do you mean whatever this is?"

"There are rules that need to be established, procedures to be followed...much like a mission," she answered as she adjusted herself on the bed

"There you go again with rules and procedures...This is not a mission you know...,"

"Yes, but..."

"But what? You have changed your mind haven't you?" he asked in a worried tone " We have been in a RELATIONSHIP and yes that is what it is technically called for the sum total of ten minutes and you have already changed your mind?" he snorted as he put his hands on his hips and began to pace around the room muttering to himself "I should have known you would change your mind...that's what you women do...get us all wound up and then change your bloody mind at the last minute"

M had a hard time not laughing at him as he pranced around the room like a wounded rooster.

"I would love to know what you think is so funny?" he demanded as he stopped and towered over her

"You" was all she said with a laugh

"Oh great, now you are laughing at me" he said as he turned away from her and began to pout

"No, I am not laughing at you," she replied as she reached out for his hand "but I am giving you a chance to exit this conversation and short lived relationship gracefully. I, as you well know, am not young. I cannot be what you really want, but I can be your friend..."

"Just what I need, another "friend" he said pulling away from her as he sat on the end of the bed with a rather dejected look on his face

"I'll tell you what. Why don't we start as friends then see where life takes us?" she said as she crawled to the end of the bed and put her hand on his shoulder. "I would rather have you as just a friend than not at all"

"Can we at least be "friends with benefits"?"He asked in a sulky tone

"Let's start with friends and we can talk about the "benefits" part later" she replied as she crawled back to her spot at the head of the bed and curled up "Right now I just need to rest"

"Are you alright?" he asked, the concern clearly noticeable in his voice

"Just a little sore and tired, she said as she closed her eyes "Why don't you go down and check on Tanner and Eve while I rest"

"Ok, but I'll be back" he replied as he leaned over and kissed her forehead again before he left the room.

Eve and Tanner were busy in the kitchen boiling water for spaghetti when James entered. Actually, it was hard to tell what they were doing because Tanner had one arm snaked around Eve's waist and his other hand was holding hers while they were supposedly attempting to stir the pot of water.

"So tell me Tanner, just how many people does it take to boil water?" asked James sarcastically

"Oh Bond; sorry I didn't hear you come down" replied Tanner as he quickly disengaged his grip on Eve "How is M? I see you did not stay up there too long...everything alright?" he asked

"Just peachy" snapped James

"Then what is wrong?" asked Eve as she gently pushed Tanner aside

"After agreeing to a relationship not ten minutes earlier, she has decided that she just wants to be friends for now"

"Ouch!" said Eve as she turned to face James, gently patting his shoulder "Sorry James. I know how much she means to you, I just didn't think she would use the "let's just be friends" line so quickly in your short lived relationship

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"In the real world 007 that is usually the line women use to let a guy down gently," replied Tanner "I should know, I have heard it on numerous occasions"

"No...She was not letting me down gently; she just wants to take things slow..."

"Did she tell you that there need to be rules...boundaries...something along that line?" asked Eve as she walked toward James while Tanner quickly got a chair so James could sit down.

"Well...yes...sort of," replied James as he slumped in the chair with a dumbfounded look on his face

"Poor James" said Eve as she patted his shoulder again "Stumbled into unfamiliar territory haven't you"

"I should have know it was too good to be true," mumbled James as he sat and stared at his feet

"Cheer up 007," said Tanner as he handed him a glass of scotch "At least you got to kiss the boss and you lived to tell about it. Besides, did you actually WANT to date a hall monitor who absolutely loves to follow and enforce the rules because that is exactly what you would have been doing"

"No I wouldn't"

"YES, you would"

"Maybe she dumped me because she doubted my sincerity? Because I can change"

"I think she dumped you because she knew you WOULD change and you changing is the LAST thing she wants." said Tanner as he finished his drink

"So she wants more excitement?"

"No" said Eve rolling her eyes as she pulled up a chair and sat beside him "She wants you to be you in all of your silly, ridiculous, foolish, ludicrous, utterly annoying and exasperating ways, and if you were in a relationship with her...let's face it, you WOULD change,"

"Well, I wouldn't have to," replied James

"Oh but you would, you would have no choice. Take Bill for example,"

"Hey now...What do you mean "Take Bill for example?" asked Tanner defensively

"Look, All I am saying is that people change when they are in a relationship,"

"Nope, not me...not going to happen" said James defiantly "Still going to break into her flat and drink her best scotch...still going to blow stuff up...still going to disobey orders...,"

"Still going to take the asinine risks that you do on missions knowing that she is waiting for you at home?" asked Tanner in a serious tone "Because she would expect nothing less and you know it"

"Hmmm...I never thought about it that way," replied James

"Maybe not, but she has. In fact she probably thought of every conceivable way this could go wrong five seconds after the words left her lips"

"Well aren't you two just a couple of little rays of sunshine" replied James as he finished his drink

"Hey, not to change the subject, but do either of you suppose that we could call her by her actual name while we are here? I mean using titles is so formal...," asked Eve before Tanner abruptly cut her off

"Do you seriously have a death wish?" he asked

"Well no but..."

"Then don't even consider the idea. M's true identity is a secret for a reason..."

"I know what it is" chimed James with a grin

"Yes, and you have been threatened within an inch of your life if you ever mention it" snapped Tanner

"Then you also know what it is" replied Eve "her real name"

"Of course I do, I wouldn't be a very good assistant if I didn't"

"Could we at least ask her?" asked Eve, pleading like a child would plead with her parent for permission to do something normally not allowed

"Could we at least ask her what?" asked M as she stood in the doorway listening to the conversation

"Oh Eve was just wondering if we could call you by your real name for the remainder of the time we are here together...less informal...less intimidating would be more appropriate" quipped James with a grin

"Absolutely NOT" replied M as she walked across the room and took a seat at the table "Under no circumstance are any of you to call me by my real name...it is against protocol. Your being here at all is stretching the rules a bit thin as it is" replied M sounding almost annoyed at the question

"But..." started Eve

"End of discussion Ms. Moneypenny. However, if you really would like to be less formal, how about we call each other by our "given" middle names?" she suggested

"Ummm, no that's ok" replied Eve as she quickly got up to stir the boiling water

"What is wrong with that?" asked James as he stared at Eve curiously "Something to hide perhaps?"

"Nothing to hide" replied Eve nervously "Let's just forget I ever brought up the subject and move on"

"Oh now I have to know" said James teasingly "Just what is your middle name?"

"Be careful James" warned M "If I reveal her middle name, I will also reveal your middle name"

"What? It is Andrew. Nothing special about that" he replied in a confident tone

"Remember I said your "given" middle name, not the one you choose to use"

Tanner stood in the corner of the room with a smirk on his face.

"What are you laughing at?" snapped James "Yours is not much better"

"I'm not laughing" he replied suddenly regaining his composure "Not laughing at all, what do you mean mine is not much better? How do you know what my middle name is?"

"I'm, a spy Tanner, it is my job to know such things" replied James with a wink

"Alright children enough" cautioned M

"Come on Eve, what is your middle name?" teased James as he turned to face her

"None of your business" snapped Eve as she dropped the spaghetti into the boiling water

"No, I'm sure that is not it, if it were it would look pretty ridiculous on a birth certificate," quipped James "I bet it is something like daffodil or primrose?"

"No, and no amount of prying will ever get me to say it out loud" replied Eve

"I know," said Tanner, almost celebrating the fact that he knew something that the great 007 did not "But I will never tell"

"You better not" snapped Eve "remember I know how to shoot a gun"

"Yes but we also know how good your aim is" replied James smugly

"Now now" said M in a rather parental tone, "Suppose we change the subject before we have a small war on our hands"

"Now there you go spoiling all of the fun" replied James teasingly "It won't take me long to figure it out you know"

"Hall monitor" said Tanner under his breath as he walked behind James to get a strainer for the spaghetti

"What was that?" asked M curiously

"Nothing Ma'am. Inside joke"

"Yes, well then keep it to yourself" she snapped knowing full well what he meant. It was no secret that hall monitor was a reference many people at MI6 used when referring to her and her well known penchant for obeying rules, that and Evil Queen of Numbers.

"I like the idea of going by our middle names...sort of a compromise to the title only versus first name conundrum we have" said James absently as he reached over and took M's hand and gave it a light squeeze

"Really" said M with a questioning glance "You would rather I call you Andronicus than James or 007?"

"Andronicus?" exclaimed Tanner "Really?"

"Hey, it is better than Egbert," retorted James

Eve stood at the stove with her back to the rest of them giggling to herself.

"What are you laughing at Miss Luella-May?" asked Tanner sarcastically

"Luella-May? Really?" said James "Looks as if M has the only normal middle name" he said looking at M, prompting her to reveal her middle name.

"Catherine" she said rolling her eyes "See, this is why it is better to stick with what we know" as she was about to continue the pot on the stove began to boil over sending hot, sticky gluten enriched water all over the stove

"Great another fine mess you have gotten us into," quipped James as he removed the pan from the burner

"Keep it up Andronicus!" snapped Eve as she glared at James while cleaning up the mess "Keep it up!"

"So can I assume that we will all be sticking to our first names with the exception of M?" asked Tanner with a grin

James, Eve and M all turned to face him with quizzical looks on their faces

"Just thought I would ask for clarification," replied Tanner with a smirk

TO BE CONTINUED...


	10. Chapter 10 chapater 10

Sorry this has taken so long. Hope it was worth the wait.

With dinner done and the dishes washed and put in their proper place or rather where James thought they should be, the four temporary roommates had all settled down for a nice quiet evening of attempted relaxation. To be fair the word relaxation was a foreign word for all of them as their idea of relaxing usually included copious amounts of alcohol, high speed chases, women with forgettable faces, mountains of paperwork and a display of their command of every explicative and its proper use in a sentence.

Eve perched herself on the sofa with the remote control in hand attempting to find anything slightly interesting on the television while Tanner sat at M's desk staring at his computer screen, occasionally wrinkling up his face at the messages he was receiving while James slouched in the wing backed chair eyeing the liquor cabinet. M had seated herself at her dining room table with papers spread from one end to the other, oblivious to the boredom that had engulfed her sitting room.

The silence was deafening only to be interrupted by the occasional groan from the sitting room or annoyed comment by M as she made a notation on the report she was working on.

"Anyone for tea?" asked James as he began to pace around

"Tea? We just finished dinner" replied Eve as she cast him an annoyed glance

"Well I was going to suggest a scotch but as you so helpfully pointed out earlier, we're not supposed to mix our medication and alcohol," he snapped back

"Why don't you go see if you can be of any assistance to M?" suggested Tanner, looking up from the computer screen

"I sincerely doubt that she wants my help since she is currently working on the budget..."

"Well that would explain her mood!" interrupted Eve with a smirk

As James was about to respond the phone rang. Eve and Tanner sprang from their seats in an attempt to race for the receiver only to have M stop them dead in their tracks.

"This is not the office!" she said as she placed her hand on the phone "I believe that I am entirely capable of answering my own phone," She concluded as she picked up the phone and disappeared back into the dining room.

"Guess she told you" quipped James with a wink

"Shut up James!" replied Eve as she slowly returned to the sofa

"Why don't we try to get M to play a game or something once she is off the phone?" said Tanner

"M...Play a game? What did you have in mind 20 questions or how about a nice rousing game of truth or dare" snapped James "For being her assistant you sure don't know much about her. M is not the game playing sort of person"

"Who says?" asked Eve "Has either of you ever asked her to play a game before?"

As James was formulating an answer, M appeared in the doorway with four thermometers in her hand.

"What are those for?" asked James curiously "And are they oral or rectal?"

"Only you would ask such a stupid question," snapped Eve

"It is not such a stupid question when you consider where they are to be inserted," replied Tanner innocently

M dropped her head and let out a deep and slightly annoyed sigh.

"Enough already!" she said in that tone most parents use when they are at the end of their rope and are doing their best not to choke the next person to ask a stupid question "That was the doctor," she began "We are all to take our temperatures and if they are all normal or within normal range, whatever that means, then we shall all be released to return to our own lives and God willing, our own homes in the morning" she said

"But we are still sick" protested James, not liking the idea of leaving

"We shall see," replied M handing him his thermometer "And to answer your previous question Mr. Tanner, Oral!"

A look of relief passed over Tanner and Eve's faces as they took their thermometers, while James continued to stare at his in disappointment. Not so much about the type of thermometer, but at the thought of leaving.

"What is the matter James?" asked M "Not sure how it works?"

"No, it's not that" he grumbled as he walked out of the room and into the kitchen

"What's up with him? I would think he would be glad to be released from our "prison" for lack of a better word, no offense M," said Tanner

M shook her head and left the room in search of James while Eve continued to stare at Tanner in disbelief.

"You really don't understand relationships do you?" she said with a sigh

"What...what relationship? They don't HAVE a relationship!" he muttered just loud enough for Eve to hear

"Maybe not now, but the longer we stay here, the more time he has to work on her and get her to see that he is in love with her!" she grumbled back before she thrust the thermometer in her mouth

"Oh" Replied Tanner with a slightly enlightened expression on his face "It will never work" he said as he reread the packaging on his thermometer to be sure what type it was before he popped it in his mouth

"Seriously..." said Eve rolling her eyes

"What?"

"You actually had to read the packaging?"

"Absolutely!" he said taking the thermometer out of his mouth "You never can be too cautious" he finished before popping it back into his mouth leaving Eve with a confused and yet slightly entertained look on her face.

M followed James to the kitchen and found him leaning against the sink, thermometer in hand staring out the window with a sulking expression on his face.

"Care to tell me what is wrong?" she asked as she came to stand beside him

"No, not really" he said, carefully avoiding her gaze

"You do realize that you cannot stay here indefinitely," she said as she continued to look up at him

"I wouldn't consider forty eight hours indefinitely," he mumbled

"What is really wrong?" she asked point blank "Is it that I turned you down rather abruptly for which I apologize. I had no right to even give you the slightest impression that we could ever be more than we are or is it something else?"

"No" he said turning to face her, "It's just that I had forgotten what it is like to be part of a family, living under one roof, squabbling over the most benign things. I had forgotten what it is like to be needed for something other than a mission and I miss it," he said as he tore open his thermometer and put it in his mouth, thus ending the discussion

"Oh I see" replied M quietly as she turned and faced the window "So you only needed if it is for a mission"

James looked down at her and nodded and returned his gaze to the window

"Well it may surprise you to know that I need you," she said, placing her hand on his arm

James raised his eyebrows at her rather uncharacteristic statement

"I need you to be out there, hiding in the shadows... protecting us...protecting me..." she said quietly

James turned slightly to lean against the counter and took the thermometer out of his mouth as he listened to her with a slight look of disbelief.

"It gives me great comfort to know that you are THERE...to be honest it is the only way I can come home at night and actually sleep,"

"Really?" he replied in a slightly sarcastic tone

"Look" she said firmly as she looked up at him "I am not ruling out the possibility of a relationship in the future, but for right now I need you to go out there and do your job without any distractions..."

"So you only see yourself as a distraction?"

"Without ANY distractions!" she continued "And then, someday in the hopefully very distant future, maybe...MAYBE if you are still interested, we can revisit this topic and see where it may lead," she concluded

"So let me get this straight" he said twirling his thermometer in his fingers as though it were a pencil, "You are not saying yes, but you are not saying no either?"

"Right!"

"I will never understand the logic of a woman" he replied shaking his head as he leaned over and kissed her cheek

"That is the idea," she said with a smirk as she reached up and cupped his cheek "You are not supposed to understand..."

"Or argue, or disagree or question..."

"Exactly!"

"I guess this explains why I have never really had a lasting relationship," he said as he put his arm around her and began guiding her back to the sitting room

M looked up at him with a rather quizzical look

"No one ever explained the "Rules" to me," he concluded with a grin

"Rules?...what rules?" asked Tanner as M and James appeared in the doorway

"The ones that pertain to relationships...Something you would know nothing about" quipped James

"Hey now!" replied Tanner "I may not be a Casanova, but I do know to keep my mouth shut and to just nod in agreement"

"Oh Bill" interrupted Eve with a snicker "You have a lot to learn"

"Alright children, that is enough!" said M "Anyone care to tell me what their thermometer says?"

"Normal" replied Tanner cheerfully

"Normal" said Eve rereading hers

"James?" asked M

"Normal I suppose," he said in an almost defeated tone

"And just how would you know?" asked M as she reached over, took his thermometer and shoved it into his mouth "You didn't keep it in there long enough"

"Big surprise that relationship rules aren't the only rules he cannot seem to follow," muttered Tanner under his breath

"That will be enough out of you!" snapped M glaring at Tanner as she reached over and took the thermometer out of James' mouth "Almost normal" she said looking up at him.

"Looks like we will ALL be going home in the morning" said Tanner as he went back to the desk to shut down the computer

"Well, at least you two will be going home" replied M as she took a seat on the sofa "I think James could do with ONE more day of quarantine"

"But he's FINE!" snapped Tanner, glaring at James

"Come on Bill," replied Eve, grabbing his arm and shoving him towards the kitchen "Let's go make some tea"

"But he is! he is perfectly FINE!" mumbled Bill as he made his way out of the sitting room

"Just another example of how little you know about the "rules" of relationships!" replied Eve

"But..."

"Her house, Her rules" replied Eve with a wink

TO BE CONTINUED...


	11. final chapter

Sorry this has taken so long. Life got in the way and I honestly could not find the right ending. Thank you for all of your kind words of encouragement and for you infinite patience. I hope it was worth the wait.

Cohabitation: Final Chapter

After seeing to it that Eve and Tanner were safely on their way to their respective homes, M turned to see James leaning against the wall with a bit of a smirk on his face.

"Something you find amusing?" She asked as she brushed past him on her way to the sitting room

"I was just marveling at how crafty you really are" he replied as he followed her to the sofa

"How so?"

"If I didn't know better I would almost say that you orchestrated this whole ordeal just so that we could be alone"

"Yes James, you've caught me," she replied sarcastically "I intentionally gave us all Chicken Pox just so I would have an excuse to have a sleep over that lasted far longer than I wished, all so I could spend a few days alone with you!" she said sharply "Just one thing wrong with that logic…"

"Oh and what is that?" he asked hesitantly

"If that had been my true intention, why on earth would I have included my Chief of Staff and my Secretary?"

"Plausible deniability" he quipped "That does happen to be an area where you have exceptional expertise, at least as where I am concerned"

"Yes, thank you for that notation on my CV listed under "Special Skills acquired" she replied "You know the skill of being to be able to spin a tale of the utmost absurdity into a believable tale is only truly useful when dealing with small children or having to explain your behavior on a mission the PM, neither of which do I take much pleasure in doing" she said with an icy glare

James was stunned by the sudden change in her mood. Only a few short days earlier she had professed to love him, but now it almost seemed that she loathed him.

"What is really bothering you M?" he asked as he reached over and took her hand "Over the years I have become accustomed to your frequent mood swings, but this is different. I can't quite put my finger on it, but this time something is definitely different. One minute you are angry with me, then you tell me that you love me, then within a matter of minutes you change your mind, then you arrange for us to be here alone and now you act as if you cannot stand the sight of me. What is going on?" he asked sincerely

The sincerity in his voice and the worried look on his face nearly broke her heart. What she wanted and what was actually attainable were on completely opposite ends of the spectrum. She loved him, and for a brief moment, she allowed herself to entertain the notion that the relationship could actually work. But then the practical side of her brain took over and the realization of the absurdity of this very notion presented itself. Some of the obvious obstacles could be overcome like the age difference, the severe breach in protocol of dating one of her subordinates, the logistics in carrying on such a relationship given their profession, which by its very nature, could come to an abrupt end at any given moment. It just was not fair and somehow she had to make him understand without completely crushing his soul in the process.

"My dear James" she said softly "I…"

"Oh no you don't!" he responded as he pulled his hand back "You are not going to just…"

"You don't even know what I was going to say,"

"Oh I have a pretty good idea. I bet it goes something like this "Some things were just not meant to be blah blah blah! Well that is a load of crap and you know it! You are just scared and you are too afraid to admit it!"

"I am not afraid to admit it, but I am willing to accept it, which is more than I can say for you. We have a rather unorthodox relationship that is as complex as the day is long. However, at the end of the day, we are no more than companions who depend on and rely on each other because, let's face it, no one else could possibly understand our crazy mixed up lives. Neither of us is capable of having a normal relationship, so we cling to each other out of nothing more than self- preservation. It's not perfect, but it is who we are, it is how we survive. It is all we have ever done and all we will ever be able to do and the sooner we realize this and accept it for what it is, the sooner we can resume our lives."

"What if I don't want to accept it?" he asked quietly

"I am afraid you have no choice in the matter. WE have no choice in the matter. We must play the game with the cards we are dealt."

"So does this mean that we cannot at least be friends?"

"We shall always be friends" she said as she leaned back and rested her head on his shoulder "However if you cross me, I shall not hesitate to end you, and make no mistake, I will get away with it because I know how to hide a body"

"Funny enough so do I" he said with a laugh "So where do we go from here?"

"Business as usual. I will continue to issue orders and you will presumably continue to disobey them. You will make messes and I will clean them up. It is a perfect arrangement if you think about it" she said with a giggle

"What do we tell Eve and Tanner?"

"Why must we tell them anything? We are in the business of deception and secrecy. I think our silence will speak volumes. They are our friends as well as our co-conspirators. They will understand and respect our privacy"

"Well, this is certainly NOT how I envisioned this day going" said James in a rather defeated and disappointed tone "and for the record I am not particularly a fan of this "game" as you call it"

"I can't say I am either 007, but it is what it is," she replied with a long deep sigh

The two of them sat on the sofa in companionable silence for a long time.

"I guess I should be going" he replied as he leaned over and placed a gentle kiss to her forehead before rising and turning toward the door.

She nodded in agreement as she rose to escort him

"See you in the morning?" she asked as he turned the knob

"Yes Ma'am, bright and early." He replied as he headed out the door "I love you M" he said softly

"I love you too James" she replied as she closed the door.


End file.
